What The Universe Holds
by Tsubasa-fan
Summary: AU based on the moviebook Solaris. As Kurogane boards the ship orbiting the planet Solaris, faded memories of a lover begin to emerge. Kurogane tries to solve the mystery of Fai's reappearence and the strange planet that brought them together againKuroFai
1. Death

Title: What the Universe Holds

Pairings: Kurogane/Fai, Yasha/Ashura,

Rating: M

Prompt: #76 Death

Word Count: 600

Warnings: Yaoi, death, angst, romance, language

Notes: AU set to the the movie Solaris. Some characters will be OOC.

Disclaimer: Solaris (both movie and novel) and the CLAMP characters are not mine.

_**Italics- **__past events, thoughts._

* * *

Two months, two months he had been traveling in the same capsule, but it all paid off. After two long months by himself, he looked out of his small rectangular window to see Solaris, the massive planet almost translucent in appearance, blue hues making the mass of unknown matter glow in the darkness of space.

He turns to look at the orbiting ship, glad to see the gray hunk of metal. Several attempts at radio contact have failed. His capsule finally docks with the ship,and in his space suit he slowly makes his way past several pods. Gathering himself he see's no signs of life, an uneasy feeling slowly blooming in his stomach.

'Empty.' Was his only thought as he pulled off the suit. He makes his way to the corner room where the computer terminals rest. Noticing a large screen on the wall with Mihara's face, he presses a button and watches the video.

"Kurogane, it was so good of you to come. I need to tell you something while I still have time.I would guess by now you know about me, and if not, get Syaoran or Yasha to tell you. I'm not crazy, if it happens to youyou'll know what I mean. Just know that the only way to make it stop, in my opinion, is to destroy Solaris." Mihara paused in his video, talking off screen to someone, but the screen freezes, ending the film.

Kurogane leaves, searching for the crew that was stationed here. The man goes into a dimly lit room, he sees Syaoran in a desk chair, legs propped up onto the metal and plastic desk in fornt of him.

"Syaoran, did you hear my transmissions?" The younger male turns, slight fear shining in his eyes as he looks at the dark haired man.

"What happened to Mihara?"

"He's dead, he killed himself."

"What happened here?"

"I can't say, I'm too tired to talk about it now."

"Then where's Yasha?"

"His room, but he refuses to come out." Syaoran turns, hazel meeting garnet. "He won't let you in, I've tried."

Kurogane doesn't say anything as he turns and leaves the lounging kid. Thoughts of his friends death causing that uneasy feeling to grow a little larger. He makes it to Yasha's room, knocking calmly on the metal door, he states simply. "Let me in."

"What do you want? You're only here because of the company in charge of this damn project."

"I'm here to salvage the mission, to check this crew's mental health, and bring all of you home, now Syaoran told me about Mihara, but I want to hear your side of the story."

"The same thing will happen to you, Kurogane, and his body's in the lab, maybe she's gone now." The stoic voice was rambling and Kurogane was becoming more confused by the minute.

'She?' There were no females part of the crew."Who are you talking about" Yasha doesn't answer.

"I'll go home once I figure out what has happened and how to stop it."

Kurogane leaves after checking Mihara's body, passing Syaoran on the way. A hand grasps his arm, their eyes meet again as the male smiles at him.

"Kurogane-san, I find it's better to barricade the door when I sleep." They parted ways after the cryptic message.


	2. Rebirth

Title: What the Universe Holds

Pairings: Kurogane/Fai, Yasha/Ashura,

Rating: M

Prompt: #78 Rebirth

Word Count: 789

Warnings: Yaoi, death, angst, romance, language

Notes: Solaris (both movie and novel) and the CLAMP characters are not mine.

* * *

Kurogane lays down, his room engulfed in darkness, as he struggles to go to sleep. After getting up to check that, yes the door is locked, he finally manages to drift off to sleep. He dreamt, a pair of pink lips, slightly open as if tyring to say something, clouds his mind's eye. Kurogane continues to dream, the owner of those lips emerges, the blue eyes hiding a little known intelligence.

The dream shifts, that person locked eyes with him on the train, Kurogane sits across from the thin figure, their eyes lock. He dreams of those lips touching his own like they used to. He opens his bleary eyes taking in the dark surroundings of the room, a hand raises to touch his lips. Kurogane looks up, noticing the shift of weight on the bed. He sees the person from his dream, he simply stares. 'I'm still dreaming.'

The blonde kisses him, without hesitation he returns the kiss. The slim figure leaned his head back against Kurogane's shoulder, blonde hair sticking to the tan skin while his arm bent above him, cupping Kurogane's cheek. Heat radiated from Kurogane's chest as he pressed against the other's back, sweat gluing them together.

Stretched out on their sides, Kurogane held the blondes leg, stroking into him from behind. The others bare foot lay against the curve of the taller's muscled leg. The bed sheets pulled on the floor, a corner caught beneath the two bodies. The pilant body rocked back into Kurogane's thrusts, fingers deftly trailed down Kurogane's cheek.

"...Fuck." The dark haired male moaned out, his hold on the pale thigh tightening. He shuddered as his rythme faltered for a moment, the feeling of the other surrounding him pure bliss. A mewl escaped those thin lips as he felt the erratic hearbeat of the man pressed against his back.

They both reached completion slowly and lazily, crashing around them in waves. Kurogane shifted behind the other male, pulling himself free. His muscular arms wrapped around the small waist, kissing the damp mop of blonde hair. The two lovers curled around eachother, a slim hand covering a larger one.

* * *

Kurogane wakes up to see the blonde in his arms, terror that is barely contained crosses his face as he realizes that he hadn't been simplying dreaming.

"What the hell? I'm awake?"

"Yes." Pale arms wrap around him.

"Where did you come from?" Kisses litter his jaw and neck.

"Kuro-chan, what's wrong?" He stops the kisses, looking worriedly into red eyes. His name spoken from those lips made him want to scream. He gets up from the bed, as blue eyes follow his every movement.

"I love you, don't you love me?"

"...Yes...I need to see Syaoran for a minute."

"Don't." The arms tighten their hold on him, he feels that delicate face against his back.

"Why, what's wrong?"

"I don't know, just don't leave me, Kuro-san." He reaches the blonde a blue sleeping pill, telling him it's for his nerves.

Kurogane then leads the shorter figure to one of the pods, opening the door he motions for her to step inside, the blonde expecting a ride, but when the door closes and the pod is launched into space. The blonde looks confused as Kurogane stays at the docking bay.

_The smell of coffee wafts through the small apartment, a frail hand laying on the red couches arm, as rain streaks down the window._

Kurogane returns to his room, crushed at what he just did, Syaoran's voice breaks the silence.

"Try and stay calm, you're the doctor on the ship."

"What was that?"

"We don't really know, but personally I believe it's God, or at least some form of higher being."

"Sceintifically, what is it?" Kurogane was still reeling.

"I'm still confused about that myself. It started with Mihara, after it happened to him, he locked himself in his room. We just thought he was having a nervous breakdown. In truth he had someone in there...he was trying to figure it out." Syaoran stops as he looks at the slouched form on the bed. "Who was he?"

"My lover."

"So I guess that means he's dead?" He doesn't need to see or hear Kurogane's confirmation.

"He came from your memories of him, what was his name?"

"Fai...will he come back?" Kurogane look's into Syaoran's eyes.

"It's safe to say so."

"Mihara said that Solaris should be destroyed."

"That really is insane, we've found God, we only need to find a way to prove this to everyone back on Earth."


	3. Shapes

Title: What the Universe Holds

Pairings: Kurogane/Fai, Yasha/Ashura,

Rating: M

Prompt:

Word Count: 1,216

Warnings: Yaoi, death, angst, romance, language

Notes: AU based on the movie Solaris, Most of the dialougue is taking from the movie.

Disclaimer: Solaris (both movie and novel) and the CLAMP characters are not mine.

* * *

Kurogane rummages through old video files, searching for answers. He discovers a tape of the three scientists talking about the God-like planet. 

"It's God." Declared the Syaoran on the tape.

"It doesn't matter, we need to find a way to make all of this go away." Yasha glared at the younger man.

"But think of the opportunities..." Mihara, always the scientist, always the one out for new discoveries.

"No! What if it follows us back home? What if this, whatever the hell it is starting happening on a mass scale back on Earth?!" Anger blooms on Yasha's always passive face, as he slams a fist down on the gray table.

"We're not even sure, whatever it is, will let us leave." Syaoran stares at the other two, face neutral compared to his crewmates.

"Perhaps it's like a spider web, waiting for something to show up." The scientist's voice faded as Kurogane turned his attention away from the video.

* * *

He played another video, this one from his dead friends video journals. The screen showed Mihara staring at the camera, his hair even more disheveled and signs of stress were apparent on his semmingly tired face. 

"...You ask questions at the end of your life, the sort of questions people who are content just don't ask...maybe life just can't be solved, maybe there are no answers for it just endless questions."

Kurogane stops the tape, turning off the screen as he gets up and exits the room. He enters his own room without so much as turning on the lights, the dark haired man flops down on his bed, the others words playing over and over again in his mind. Eventually the mixture of shock and stress lull him to sleep.

A pair of lips press against his and unconsciously he reacts hungrily crushing his lips to familiar ones.

"Fai..."

"Make love to me." Half lidded eyes gaze lustfully down at him, he could never say no to the blonde and now was no exception. How he had missed those fingers roaming over his skin, how he had missed tracing the contours of the body above his kissing sweaty skin as he savored the long forgotten taste.

* * *

Kurogane wakes up to see Fai asleep, blonde bangs covering his closed eyes. His gaze turns to the ceiling as memories flood his mind, images of the blonde sleeping soundly beside him resurface after years of dormancy. 

_Red eyes stare intently at the man across from him. The blonde hasn't noticed the stranger staring at him from across the train seats yet, but when he does there eyes lock on to eachother and both males seemingly go in to a trance neither looking away. _

_The train stops after what seems like hours and the blue eyed man that had stared back gets up to leave, breaking the spell that held their gazes together. Kurogane looks after him, blue and red lock on again for a brief moment before the train starts to move again._

Their first meeting, he smiled fondly, a the faded memory.

_He had arrived at the party late, Tomoyo and Yuuko hadn't caught him yet so he wanted to avoid meeting his cousin and boss just a little longer. He scanned the room trying to find the two woman so he could stay away from them, but a flash of blonde caught his attention. He had just walked into the room and had immediately spotted Kurogane in the crowd._

_The blonde smiles at him, while he can only manage a smirk. Both are happy to see eachother again. Kurogane makes his way to the strange man._

_"And Death Shall Have No Dominion." Stated the dark haired man, the blonde looked at him confused._

_"A book?"_

_"No, poem, by Dyaln Thomas, you reminded me of it when I saw you on the train." Kurogane doesn't understand why this man makes him so brave, he would never does this to anyone else._

_"My Thomas is a little rusty." The smile almost reaches the others eyes. Kurogane whispers the rest of the poem to the man. _

_"That's not a very happy poem you know." A frown taking place of the almost smile on the pale face._

_"You didn't seem very happen then, you don't now either."_

_"I wasn't, but tonight's getting better." The blonde leans up and whispers into his ear, hot breath tickling his neck, sending shivers down his spine._

_"That's...good to know."_

He blushed at the thought, he remembered how Tomoyo had teased him relentlessly for the rest of the week. He looks back at Fai who is still sleeping and reaches over to brush away a few strands of hair. Kurogane frowns, his brow creasing as images of that night swarm him.

_The opened bottle lays on their bed, an even colder hand rests outstretched on the red sofa, the pale skin of its owner contrasts starkiling against each other. Rain streaks the windows as small rivlets race down the glass pane. Burnt coffee wafts into the bedroom._

* * *

"So, what do you remember?" They sit beside eachother Fai resting against his lover. Blue eyes look up into red, confusion marring the beautiful face. 

"Kuro-rinta?"

"Do you remember movies, books, friends, family?" Fai thinks for a moment before he smiles.

"I do, but only now that you've mentioned it. As soon as you said it, I remembered." Fai turns his attention away from Kurogane to stare out the small window to Solaris.

"Kuro-wanko, is it a planet?"

"It's in a continuum that wasn't known to exist until a few years ago, I guess you could say it's in it's own dimension. It's a violation against everything we thought about the universe, space, or even space-time."

"Does it have intelligence?"

"Beyond anything we've ever seen."

"So it's something like a god, right?"

"Who knows." Fai smiles at Kurogane's stubborness he leans to kiss him, but the intercom interrupts them.

"Kurogane-san, are you awake?" Syaoran's voice echoed in the room.

"Yes, what is it?"

"Can you meet me and Yasha on A deck in about an hour?"

"Yes."

Kurogane kisses Fai's forehead as the blonde fidgets nervously.

"You okay?" Blonde hair sways as Fai nods in approval. The doctor closes the door behind him as he leaves his lover in the room. He stands just outside the locked door, listening for anything bad, he starts to move away until he hears a crash and the shattering of glass.

He rushes back in to see Fai covered in blood shards of glass glitter on the floor.

"Fai?"

"What...happened to me?"

"It looks like you were trying to break down the door, why would you do that?"

"I paniced when you left." Kurogane carries the blonde to the bed, rushing to the bathroom to get the first aide kit. He returns to see Fai's wounds healing in front of him. Fai looks at him horrified.

"What the hell?"

"Kuro-pon, whats wrong with me?" Frightened eyes look up at the doctor wide and unblinking.


	4. Couple

Title: What the Universe Holds

Pairings: Kurogane/Fai, Yasha/Ashura, others

Rating: M

Prompt:

Word Count: 783

Warnings: Yaoi, death, angst, romance, language

Notes: AU based on the movie Solaris, Most of the dialougue is taking from the movie.

Disclaimer: Solaris (both movie and novel) and the CLAMP characters are not mine.

* * *

"Am I alright?" Fai asks worriedly as he sits on one of the ships hospital beds.

"Yes." Kurogane and the others had since had the blonde do numerous tests.

"He won't do it you know." Syaoran whispers to Yasha, while they stand away from the couple. The older man is about to answer when Kurogane and Fai come towards them, both men exchange glances.

"This is Fai, my lover." Fai stands beside his lover, greeting Syaoran and instantly liking the younger man, Yasha is another story.

"Kurogane-san, we need to talk to you alone."

"It's fine, go ahead."

"I think we should share our...experiences with our visitors. Maybe we can find out something." Yasha then turns to Fai, who looks away from the harsh gaze.

"Who was it for you, Yasha?"

"My wife." Yasha looked lost as he spoke.

"Syaoran?" Kurogane turned to the youngest crew member.

"My brother."

"He appeared here exactly as he had before?" All three men look at eachother, Fai is shocked by the word 'before'.

"When you cut yourself did it hurt?" Kurogane looks at Fai. Fai nods in agreement.

"It's like a game, where they just keep reappearing again and again." Syaoran looked at the others, a worried look crossing his features.

* * *

_Fai walked across their kitchen, making himself a cup of tea, halfway through he sees the bedroom light on. He knows that Kurogane's awake and as if proving him right the other man joins him in the kitchen. _

_"Why aren't you in bed?" Blurry eyes meet blue._

_"I just wanted to think." Both know the malice behind the innocent words. Fai raises drinks his tea in small sips, all the while not looking at the other man._

_

* * *

_

_The chatter of the people around fades away as they continue sit beside eachother on one of the couches. Somewhere of in the distance Kurogane can hear Tomoyo entertaining guests._

_"I used to have a brother, a twin actually, and we used to have such strange...visions. Well it's hard to explain, the where more like dreamscapes, like time woud stand still, but we used to do so much more."_

_"Like what?" Kurogane listens intently, not wanting to ask about the 'used to' part._

_"We used to pretend we could do magic...we would sit alone outside and stare at the clouds or talk to the trees and when it snowed, that was always the best, we would stay out alll day catching snowflakes." Kurogane smiled lightly at the warmth that had crept into the blonde's words as he spoke._

_"How old were you?"_

_"Six or seven. What was really bad was that our father caught us one time and when we tried to explain it to him he got this strange look on his face."_

_"What kind of look?"_

_"Wary, because I think he knew that we would see him for what he truly was...I guess that's part of the reason why-" The life that had started to burn behind those blue eyes sputtered and died like a drenched flame._

_"We don't have to talk about that."_

_"You know your the first person I've ever told this to." _

_

* * *

_

"I remember days were I would just think about you."

_Both had prominent jobs. Kurogane a psychiatrist, Fai a photographer. Everyone can tell they aren't fully there. Both are distracted by the idea of each other. Both smile, surprising their fellow workers, and they like it._

"Just thinking about what you were doing and saying, I was consumed by it. I loved it so much, the feeling it brought me." Fai leaned against Kurogane as they sat on the hard bed.

"I felt the same." Kurogane kisses the top of the blondes head tenderly. Fai raises changing into a set of loose clothes Kurogane found in one of the storage rooms. Red eyes staring at him sent shivers down her spine.

"I used to watch you undress." Fai stands in only a pair of sweat pants that hang precariously on his slim hips. He blushes and smiles at his lover's words.

"I...never got tired of it, every time it was exciting, you were and are beautiful. Right until the end."

* * *

"What happened to us exactly?"

"You mean...you don't remember?" Fai shakes his head slowly. Kurogane only watches.

"The only thing I remember, something burning. Coffee burning." Fai stares hard, trying to remember.


	5. Rain

Title: What the Universse Holds

Pairings: Kurogane/Fai, Yasha/Ashura, others

Rating: M

Prompt:

Word Count: 1,125

Warnings: Yaoi, death, angst, romance, language

Notes: AU based on the movie Solaris, Most of the dialougue is taking from the movie.

Disclaimer: Solaris (both movie and novel) and the CLAMP characters are not mine.

* * *

_Lights shine on the rain streaked window. The coffee maker is on, the coffee burning, as the pot begins to smoke. Fai's body is stretched across the couch._

Fai looks at Kurogane, realization dawning on his face. The taller man has been dreading this.

_Kurogane was yelling angrily at Fai, Fai's crying at the words, something that has never happened before. _

Fai eyes begin to water with tears, Kurogane brings him closer holding him to his chest.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry." Kurogane tries to console the blonde who's devasted. Fai clutches Kurogane's shirt tightly, his knuckles turning white.

"Why did you say those things?" Fai's voice is muffled in the other's shirt.

"I don't know. I didn't understand why you didn't tell me."

_Fai is laying on their red couch, dead. A crumbled note clutched in one hand. Kurogane kneels beside him eyes narrowed in pain. _

"When you said you wouldn't make it, I don't know why I didn't believe you. I don't think I took you seriously...which is worse." Kurogane held the lanky man tightly in his arms.

_Kurogane brings the cold body in his arms, kissing dull blonde bangs._

"I should have believed you."

_"How long do I need to take these?" Fai is taking some pills, _

_"Just until you start feeling better, the doctor said it would help you." Kurogane watches knowing that this is hopefully for the better. Fai nods._

_

* * *

_

Kurogane moves from the bed where Fai is asleep. Kurogane talked to Syaoran over the videophone.

"This is happening, Kurogane, you need to wake up and see that."

"..."

"Who are you trying to convince?" Kurogane looks at the sleeping blonde, he notices the dried tear stains on flushed cheeks.

"It will end badly." Kurogane didn't say anything. "Let's all meet tomorrow, Yasha has some ideas about making it stop."

_",,,he died, because our father was afraid of us after that, he thought it best to get rid of us. Yuui died because of it. I was the only one left."_

_Kurogane said nothing, hoping his presense was enough._

* * *

Both of them are eating inside Kurogane's room. Fai stops to look at his lover.

"Kuro-seme, do you know how much I like having sex with you?" Kurogane would have choked on his drink, but he was used to the blonde's bluntness. He smirked around his cup instead.

"Hn, I think I do."

"Good." They lean towards eachother, seeking comfort in the other. Kurogane whispers to the lean figure pressed against his side.

"You know, I'll agree to whatever you believe about Solaris. I'll be the little wife agreeing with his big, strong husband. You must get such a headache thinking about it."

He likes the familiarity as he stares at him. This type of teasing, the nicknames, it reminds him of when things used to be wonderful.

* * *

Fai was on his hands and knees on the bed, bracing himself. Kurogane was behind him, covering Fai's back, his hips thrusting hard. The room filled with their moans, the sound of skin against skin, and harsh pants.

Kurogane growled as his hips stilled; Fai had already climaxed with Kurogane inside him and around him.

Kurogane nuzzled Fai's damp hair, taking in the scent of sweat. Fai had fallen forward on the bed, resting on his forearms. He reached back threading it through the other's hair.

Kurogane removed himself, settling them both down on the rumpled sheets. Fai laughed as he cuddled into the man's chest.

"Kuro-pyon says 'God' alot when we do it."

"I know." Kurogane nuzzled the blonde. They both stared for a moment.

"What does Syaoran think you should do?"

"Syaoran thinks we shouldn't leave until we figure out how to prove it's existence to Earth. He thinks it's God, but he wants to show it to everyone on Earth."

"Yasha wants to destroy it." Fai looks sad as he lowers his gaze.

"He doesn't think it's God, he's afraid because he doesn't understand it."

"It was obvious from the moment he first saw me." Kurogane held the blonde closer.

"Kuro-yam, do I really feel like, I'm...?"

"Yes."

"Then I'm glad." Fai snuggled deeper into the embrace. Solaris turns slowly outside the window.

* * *

_"Everything you pursue, you end up becoming bored with it. The fact that you're good at everything you try just makes it worse." Kurogane stops talking for a moment to look at Fai whose laying in their bed, naked, just staring at the ceiling._

_"Imagine my frustration." It's said coldly, Kurogane moves from the chair he's was in and to the bed._

_

* * *

_

Fai wakes up to see his lover sound asleep. He looks around anxiously until heis movements wake up the other man.

"What's wrong." Kurogane is still half asleep as he looks worriedly at him.

"You don't love me, do you?"

"What are you talking about?"

"I'm not Fai, that Fai died, he killed himself...I'm different." Kurogane just stares, he knows he's treading on thin ice, this is dangerous.

"Who have you been talking to?"

"Yasha." Fai doesn't lie this time, especially now when there's no need.

"When I'm asleep?" He can only imagine what those conversations were like.

"I'm just trying to understand what's going on." He turns to look at Kurogane. "How have you lived the past few years? Did you love anyone?"

Kurogane can only nod, he knows that Fai knows the answer already.

"But we fought alot."

"Yeah, we fought seriouslt towards the end." Both are staring at their hands by now.

"Why did he?" Fai looks up.

"You, he said I didn't love him."

"Did you?"

"I love you." Kurogane says it in all seriousness, no anger, no sadness.

"I love you too." Fai says it as a reflex, but he means it. Fai falls asleep soon after. Kurogane rests beside him.

* * *

All of them are in the conference room. They've been arguing and debating for over an hour.

"Mihara was helpless. He had created the science that discovered Solaris, and the ship that brought us here." Yasha explained.

"Why did you agree to come here? You've lost it." Yasha turns to Kurogane and glares at Fai.

"You're a coward. I'm just as human as you are. I see, I touch, I taste, Ifeel just like you do." Fai stared icily at the long haired man.

"You're not human, try to understand that!" Kurogane moves swiftly his face only inches away from Yasha's.

"Leave now." Slowly Yasha leans forward and whispers in Kurogane's ear.

"Fai's dead, he's just a copy. He's seducing you all over again, can't you see that? You think screwing him is part of some kind of research. It's onlu fucking."

Kurogane moves away, glaring.

"It'd be hilarious if it weren't so sad." Yasha turned and left.

"We didn't even get to hear his new ideas." Syaoran had been tense over the entire conversation. Syaoran rises and goes to the door mumbling about feeling sick.

The surface of Solaris shifts like a large ocean.


	6. Ghost

Title: What the Universe Holds

Pairings: Kurogane/Fai, Yasha/Ashura, others

Rating: M

Prompt: # 97 Ghost

Word Count:

Warnings: Yaoi, death, angst, romance, language

Notes: AU based on the movie Solaris; Most of the dialogue is taking from the movie.

Disclaimer: Solaris (both movie and novel) and the CLAMP characters are not mine.

* * *

"They come when you sleep."

"That's right and we all have to sleep sometime." Syaoran shrugs at Kurogane.

* * *

Kurogane and Fai are asleep. Kurogane bolts upright the sound of footsteps in the room waking him.

"Mihara?"

"Leave the lights off." Kurogane tries to think clearly.

"I wish you had come sooner, maybe then I wouldn't have killed myself." The scientist smiles at his friend.

"You think you're dreaming me, like you do him. Understand this that I am the real Mihara just a new incarnation."

"What do you want?"

"To tell you Yasha has an idea of getting rid of the visitors."

"Will it work?"

"Yes. I'm here to warn you. Don't trust anyone; find yourself a weapon of some sort."

"I can trust Fai." Kurogane looks determined.

"You'll end up like me."

"You're not Mihara."

"Who am I then?"

"A puppet."

"What about you? Maybe you're my puppet. But like all puppets you think you're human. It's the puppet's dream, wondering if their human." Mihara smiles again.

Kurogane wakes up, his lungs burning for air, Fai wakes up startled.

"Kuro-pin, what's wrong?"

"Mihara, he talked to me, he was here." Kurogane clutches his head.

"But I thought you said he was dead?"

"He spoke to me." Kurogane leaves the room with Fai close behind. Kurogane goes to the lab where Mihara's body is laid out, the girl isn't with him.

* * *

"I love you...I never said it enough back then."

"Don't, I'm the one at risk here. If we're playing out what happened before, I won't survive." Kurogane walks over to Fai.

"It'll be different."

"How do you know? You're all I know, there was no 'you' from before." Fai looks forward depressed.

_There in a bookstore, Fai's looking at a book of poems; Kurogane's resting against the shelf in front of him. "Marry me."_

_"I'm not going to marry you." Fai says it with no ill intentions, but with a real smile. _

* * *

Kurogane wakes u to see he's alone in bed. A bad feeling crawls into his gut as he leaves. In the lab he finds Fai on the ground, his throat and part of his face eaten cleanly away. A small canister lying on the ground.

Kurogane lefts him up and takes him away. Syaoran pokes his head into the hall way.

"What happened?"

"He drank liquid oxygen." Both men go to Kurogane's room. The blonde placed down on the bed. Kurogane strokes Fai's hair.

"He's dead." Syaoran looks sadly at the older man. As they stare their shocked to see one of Fai's fingers twitch. Fai starts to shake.

"He'll come back. I think that he can only live here, that he'll die if he leaves here, but it's only a theory." Syaoran looks on as Kurogane stares at Fai who looks like he's having a seizure.

Fai's body starts convulsing, he continues to wake up. He slowly begins to return to normal.

'I never get used to these resurrections." Syaoran leaves. Kurogane places a shaking hand on Fai's forehead. Fai opens his eyes and realizes he should be dead. The blonde begins to cry.

"Why, why can't I die? I'm not Fai, you've always known that."

"Fai-"

"Don't call me that." Fai snaps at him.

"I'm not going back, I'm staying here with you.''

"Then you'll die." Fai looks coldly at him, eyes a dark shade of blue.

"I want to spend every second I can with you."

"But what will I do if you die?" Kurogane can't answer.

* * *

"Do you think I can get pregnant here?" Fai is resting beside Kurogane on the bed.

"We'll know soon."

_"I can't be a mother." It's what Fai had whispered to him at Tomoyo's party._

_"That's...good to know."_

_Kurogane is at their apartment, packing a bag. He never thought he would do this, but he never thought Fai would do that._

_"Please, don't do this. I'm begging you, Kurogane." His full name is used, it's serious._

_"You should have told me." Kurogane refuses to look at the blonde._

_"It wouldn't have made a difference. I had to Kurogane; I didn't know you would react like this."_

_"Neither did I."_

_"You never said you wanted one."_

_"I never said I didn't."_

_"Kurogane-" Fai is about to cry._

_"I can't stay here." _

_"Please, I won't make it." Fai wants to hold Kurogane back, to keep the man from leaving._

_"Then you won't make it." Kurogane leaves, brushing past Fai. A few hours later and Fai lays unconscious on the couch._

Fai has curled in on himself, sobbing. Kurogane is trying to console him.

"I came back; you know that, I came back that night."

_Kurogane reaches for the note in Fai's hand as he kneels beside him._

"I couldn't make it either, I'm so sorry." Fai has calmed down slightly, while Kurogane wraps his arms around the blonde.


	7. Sickness

Title: What the Universe Holds

Pairings: Kurogane/Fai, Yasha/Ashura, others

Rating: M

Prompt:

Word Count: 1,296

Warnings: Yaoi, death, angst, romance, language

Notes: AU based on the movie Solaris, Most of the dialougue is taking from the movie.

Disclaimer: Solaris (both movie and novel) and the CLAMP characters are not mine.

* * *

"You exist here, it's what I keep trying to tell you."

"I'm not Fai."

"Who are you then?"

"I..I am Fai, but not the man you loved years ago."

"Yes, you are."

"Am I really him?" Fai looks at him, hopefully.

"I don't know anymore, all I see is you." Kurogane pulls Fai closer to kiss him.

* * *

"I want you to help me stop Yasha's plan. I want to take him with me."

"He'll die, they're mortal, despite what he's told you. What will you do then?" Kurogane has to admit the kids probably right.

"I love him."

"This isn't the place for it."

_"Fai, marry me." Kurogane is holding an umbrela over them as they walk down the street._

_"No, I can't you know that." Both are pressed firmly against eachother, the rain pours around them, forming a curtain of water. _

_"You know fifteen, twenty more years of rejection and I'll eventually give up." Fai laughs, a hand to his face as he blushes. Kurogane runs a finger against Fai's chin, making the blonde look up at him. They kiss while the world goes by without them._

* * *

Kurogane is watching a video from Yasha.

"I feel sorry for you. If he were ugly, you wouldn't want him around, that's why he's not. He's a mirror that reflects part of your mind. You can only finish were you started, remember that." Kurogane turns the screen off, taking a sleeping pill before returning to Fai.

_Fai is on the couch. The bottle of sleeping pills spilled out on the bed._

"I've decided that if it's God, it's a sick God. It's ambitions exceed it's powers, but it doesn't realize it." Kurogane had gone back to Fai after watching the video.

"Please don't." Kurogane was tired of this.

* * *

For several days now while Kurogane slept, trying to get over his fever, Fai would talk to someone outside the room. While he had dreams that made him think he was breaking apart, Fai would return wiping sweat from his brow. He always wakes to Fai beside him

"Where did you go before?"

"Before?"

"Last night, you were talking ot someone in the hallway."

"You...must have been dreaming." Fai breaks into tears.

"What's wrong?" Kurogane sits up, Fai only shakes his head. Kurogane thinks he's going insane.

Kurogane is still feverish as he stands. 'Am I dying? Is this the last thought I'll have?' Everything goes black as he moves forward.

* * *

'I'm home now. I've tried to find the rhythm of the world where I used to live, but I'm seperate. Why did I return to Earth and lie about what happened? Lie about having contact with Solaris? I left them in the dark, we all did.' Kurogane is going home, taking the train from the city.

'Why come back at all, is it to see if he comes here?' Flashes of the station appear before him as he reaches his front door.

'I don't believe it will happen, but I'll wait anyway.' Kurogane sits in a recliner taking a drink from a cup. Everything fades again. He was remembering his last moments on the station.

He looks around and notices that Fai is gone. Kurogane sees aflashing light on the computer. It's a video message from Fai.

"Kuro-tan, don't blame them, I wanted them to do it. It's better this way. I'm sorry I tried to make you believe I was human. I read my suicide note, it was in your things, it's when I realized that I'm not him. I know you loved me though, I know that I felt that, and I love you. I wish we could just live inside that feeling forever. Maybe there's a place where we can, but I know its not on Earth and I know its not on this ship." Kurogane finally breaks down.

* * *

_Kurogane sits with the dead Fai in his arms, crying. It's still raining outside. On the floor is the note. On it is scrawled the end of a Dylan Thomas poem, the one Kurogane had qouted to him at the party._

_The first night they spoke to eachother Kurogane leans towards Fai's ear. "Though they go mad they shall be sane. Though they sink through the sea they shall rise again."_

_The note he reads. "Though lovers be lost love shall not. And death shall have no dominion." Kurogane wipes blonde bangs from his lover's face._

"You killed him!" Kurogane rushes at Yasha, but the man is in his room, the door slightly cracked.

"Not him, it."

"He'll come back."

"He won't."

"Bastard..." Kurogane snarls at the door and the man behind it.

"Whose side are you on?" Outside Solaris still moves slowly, but something seems off, something different about it's appearence

* * *

_"It's changing and if it continues, it will implode and turn inot a blackhole in about four hours and pullsus in with it." Yasha was running, Kurogane close behind._

_"Where's Syoaran?" One of the monitors he passes shows Syaoran in his room. _

_"Hey kid, we need you here!" Kurogane yells over the intercom._

_'I won't be making the trip."_

_"Syaoran up here now." Yasha tries as well._

_"I'm not Syaoran, I got rid of him. I wanted to be the only one, I wanted to be Syaoran. Besides I can't come back with you, I won't make it."_

_"Fuck, I knew it." Yasha slams a fist on the wall. Both older men look at eachother._

_"When?" Kurogane can't believe it._

_"Right away, that's why I was never really around anyone. I miss him, I think I made a mistake."_

_"You might."_

_"You want it to come with us?" Yasha is almost frantic._

_"Go ahead, I don't want t go back." Kurogane nods, he takes one last look at the younger man laying in bed. He shuts the monitor off and with Yasha leaves._

_As the ship leaves, a samll hole begins to form in the center of Solaris, slowly it expands. Within a minute the planet is swallowed in darkness._

_

* * *

_Kurogane walks outside in the city, where he now works. He boards the train, heading towards the suburbs. 'I will find new interests, new jobs, but I will not...give myself. I won't gove myself to anyone or anything, because I'm haunted by the idea that I remembered him wrong. That I shaded my memory of him to suit myself, that I caused his destruction.' 

Kurogane opens the door to his house, stepping in he removes his coat. It's still raining outside.

'I've come to believe that memory is a curse.'

He freezes in the doorway. Fai is sitting on the couch, waiting for him. The blonde turns realizing the door's open. His face melts into a smile.

Kurogane walks forward, speechless. Fai moves from the couch to stand in front of him. Kurogane breathes him in, Fai grabs him.

"How can you be here? Am I alive or dead?"

"Shh, Kuro-min, just stay with me. We don't have to think like that anymore, everything is forgiven, everything." Kurogane holds Fai gently, they sway together, both relaxing.

"I love you."

* * *

The home comes into veiw, a thick fog begins to move in, surrounding the house. The cabin is barely visible as it's enveloped in the fog. Rain continues to fall. The fog begins to form a circle, with it's body and color becoming visible. Solaris' surface swirls like a massive fog, churning like an ocean. 


End file.
